My title is a little different, it is a quote from my favorite show, Duck Dynasty. I love this show. I love this family. They are such a positive influence. I have also read their first book, and it is wonderful! I recommend it, highly. The main point of the show and the book, is Christ and Family.
I really needed this Duck Dynasty Marathon today. It has been a rough one.
Today Daulton and I traveled to Auburn University for a showcase that his travel team was hosting. It was one of those mornings where he woke up 45 minutes later than when I got him up and we ended up getting stuck in stand still traffic on 75 and had to take back roads to 285 in order to make it to his game. We got there 30 minutes before game time. I was furious. I think it was the maddest I have ever been at him. We got into this huge argument that led into this huge heart to heart, which led to us both crying and asking for forgiveness.
As I am sitting there in the stands watching him, my heart starts to break. Wait a minute, this is our last "travel" trip together. He only has three more tournaments. Two locally and one in Charleston and we are going as a family. This will be the last time it is just the two of us. And here I am in the stands trying not to loose it. Watching him, pitch three awesome innings. This is almost over. Its almost time to put out the fire.
I know it is going to be hard come August 10th. We will be moving him to Decatur, Alabama. Our life as we know it will change. I know life is about change. I am just not ready for my nest to start being empty. The Lord doesn't keep us in our comfort zones, and I know he is in control and will be with all of us during this "change".
The past week I have been doing a lot soul searching. Trying to not be overwhelmed with all of this. These 18 years have flown by. I was 20 when he was born. Wow, I look at Devyn and think "oh my goodness, I can 't believe I was her age and had two kids!" Of course I do not want that for my children. I want them to get their educations and when they are ready to marry the one God has brought to them, then I fully support them. If I could do my life over, I wouldn't. I do not regret having them so young. Like I said, I want them to wait, but I would not change my life. I thought that as my children got older I could go back to school and have a career, and then I am like, no way! Why would I do that. I have a home, a husband and my children. That is my career. This is my life and I would not change it. My goal now is to be a stay at home mom and sew and make quilts!
So, for the next six weeks, I am going to soak up every minute of time with my boy. While I regret our fuss, I don't want to regret the next six weeks. My heart is slowly breaking, but I know that it is part of God's plan. He is 18, right, it is time for him to fly out of the nest.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9